Dating & Stuttering

For the past week or so a topic has been trending in the Stuttering Community Facebook group, which I am a part of. That hot topic is dating. This topic has been popping up so much on the page that people are getting a little annoyed, especially when it leads to inappropriate posts, direct messages, and unwanted advances. I’m not going to lie, I grow a little weary of seeing this topic show up on my newsfeed. It is good to talk about such topics though. That is why I feel the need to address it.

First, yes gentlemen, there are women in this world who stutter. There are over 70 million people worldwide who stutter, and I guarantee you that not all of them are male. Where did this belief come from? No need to ask in private group pages, “where are all the female stutterers at?”. I admit that I like acquainting myself with people who understand my struggle, but gender isn’t too important to me. It’s good for you to want to affiliate yourself with people like you, but be careful and courteous about how you do so? For example, keep your social media use appropriate by not pushing unwanted advances. This is a definite no. You make yourself look just a little bit pushy, juvenile, and suspect.

Second, it is possible for all of us to have relationships/marriages. I have had two romantic relationships during my life. Maybe that is not a good track record, but it is something. I will admit that I have had more of my share of rejections, but things get better. As I get older I try not to weep too much about living single. Although one day I would love to be in a relationship with someone who can look past my stutter, be a good companion to me and nurturing mother to my children, and above all have a love and desire for Christ. These things just take time and patience. God gives us things when we’re ready.

Third, I think the best thing to do is to let the person of interest know that you have a speech impediment. If they like you enough then they should be able to look past it and accept it. If not then maybe this person is not worth your time. I deal with individuals who don’t want to be patient with me or just give me unwanted advice continuously, so I don’t bother with them. Why should I? Who should you?

To my stuttering brothers and sisters, be kind to one another; keep your heads high, and remember to accept yourself as you’re wanting someone to accept you.

God bless!

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